Raoul Duke Well, they've nailed me goddamnit. I'm trapped in some stinking desert crossroads called Baker. I don't have much time man, the fuckers are closing in! They'll hunt me down like a fucking beast!
Dr. Gonzo Whoa, getting a little paranoid?
Raoul Duke [yelling] I need a fucking lawyer immediately!
Dr. Gonzo What are you doing in Baker, didn't you get my telegram?
Raoul Duke What telegram you worthless bastard? I'll cripple your ass for this.
Dr. Gonzo You brainless scumbag, you're supposed in Vegas covering the National District Attorney's Conference, I rented a suite at the Flamingo. Everything has been arranged. Now, what are you doing out in the middle of the desert?
Raoul Duke Nothing. Never mind, it was all a big joke. Actually, I'm poolside at the Flamingo right now, talking though a portable phone some dwarf brought out from the casino. I have total credit here. DON'T come anywhere near this place, you bastard. Foreigners aren't welcome.